“Wow Techie, you’ve got really good skin right now.”

“Really? Hmmm I haven’t noticed. Maybe it’s this soap I’m using.”

“Nah… I’ve seen this glow before”

“O yeah, where?”

Smiling widely, “You’ve been getting some are you?! In fact, lots of it!”

Dumbfounded here.

Sheesh

“The problem with you Techie, is that you tend to date too much guys at the same time”

My bestfriend, AJ, suddenly blurted out in one of her weekly overseas calls.

“I’m not dating AJ, I just… go out”

“Uhuh. So you see, this kind of things, you usually do slowly you know. I mean, the whole point of dating is to get to know someone better. With the rate you’re going, you’d probably forget who you’re supposed to date with in the first place.”

I guess this would be the best time to let you guys know that N and I are taking some time off.

It’s so funny that phrase, ‘time off’. Do you really take some time out in Love?

But I guess it was no longer a question of whether I love N or not. What’s at stake at the moment is my everyday sanity. Constant fighting can really take a toll on someone.

I’ve forgotten why I was happy with him in the first place.

So now let’s just say I’m trying to set my priorities straight – to remember first and foremost that I must set some time for myself as well.

So there.

Going back to the initial topic…

I’ve started going out with friends again. Guy friends. I wouldn’t exactly call it a date, since there’s really no romantic thing involved.

Or perhaps I really don’t want to call it a date yet since N & I haven’t exactly broken up. So going out with other men would most likely be labeled as cheating. What do you think?

Now if I AM dating, would I say I’m dating one too many guys? That’s really up for a debate, but when AJ brought it up, I just can’t help but think that perhaps she’s right. And I don’t think I’m comfortable about it now.

The other day, my former ‘bestfriend’ double N (remember him? The guy I was hopelessly in love with in college?) asked me out for dinner to celebrate his recent graduation from law.

He said, “You were part of my plans when I first started with law, and now that I’m here, I just thought you should be part of my celebration.”

Well since he put it that way, I just said, “Sure.”

So picked me up from the office, and it felt really great to see him. Time has been kind to him despite the stress, and he still had that boyish/ stud charm that I went gaga with before.

The funny part is that despite our dramatics four years ago, it was Techie & double N circa 2002 all-over again. I was having fun, and it was really sweet to be with him.

When we went to a bar after dinner, another guy friend – J (my childhood sweetheart), then texted asking where I was. Me and J have been spending lots of evenings together lately, most of the time just talking over a bottle of wine. Or beer. Whichever the mood tells us.

Without exactly thinking, I just texted back, ”In Esquinita, with my bestfriend.”

I guess I don’t have to say what happened next. Ten minutes after, I was deep in conversation with double N when J tapped my shoulder.

Oh, Lord.

“Hi,” he tentatively said, eyeing double N. Double N was tentatively eyeing him back.

“Oh, hi!” I found the situation so uncomfortable, yet funny at the same time that I just thought what the heck and introduced the two them. I’ve heard of double dates, but this was ridiculous.

Still, they got along fine, and we ended-up ordering several batches of beer.

When J stood up to go to the washroom, Double N leaned in and asked “are you dating that guy?” I denied it.

When it was double N’s turn to go to the washroom, J leaned in and asked, “did I just barge in on a date?” I denied it as well.

There were pretty uncomfy moments really, like when double N and I were just staring at each other, perhaps trying to catch-up the years we weren’t together with looks when J would suddenly reach under the table and just hold my hand. Oh my. Delicious fun.

Me and J ended-up taking double N home. We drove around after that, just talking. Mostly analyzing about Double N and me.

“That kind of connection, that’s not what I would call a pure best friend thing,” J said.

“And why would you say that?”

“I just know. That’s not ‘friend’ – ‘friend’.”

I decided I’ve had enough of the uneasiness and tried to put him on the spot.

“You mean unlike us? Would you say were just ‘friend’- ‘friend’?”

It was a while before he finally answered.

“Maybe. I don’t know.”

***

The next day, I went to watch a movie with a photographer I met in a recent trip to magnificent Palawan . I call him Jake.

Now this guy, I must admit, is really intense. There’s just something about him – a certain fire that I thought I’ve been missing for quite a while now.

But I still refuse to call that outing a date though.

While waiting for the movie to start, Jake and I decided to have coffee first.

I was having a good time, retelling the mishap of the night before.

He was a good audience, he’d listen and then react at the right cue. It was exactly what I would describe as a fun time with a new friend.

Then he added, “Well that was an interesting evening. Uhm, will you do me a favor? If we’re out on a date, will you make sure that I’m the only one you’re gonna be with?”

Well so much for not calling it a date huh?

 ***